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10 Ways to get a Scuba Diving Beer Fine

10 Ways to get a Scuba Diving Beer Fine

10 Ways to Earn a Scuba Diving Beer Fine

Listen to your Instructor

As you instructor probably explained to you during your PADI open Water Course. The scuba diving industry loves a beer fine. Beer fines are for those that continue to make silly errors even after the instructor taught them. Beer Fines should normally be preceded by a warning; however, some acts of stupidity go directly to a beer fine. Here are 10 Ways to Earn a Beer Fine.

1. Mask on your forehead.

This is the classic of all beer fines. It most likely dates back to 1966 when PADI first started and Johnny Wetzstein was doing his PADI Open Water Course.

If you need more explaining why this rule is, (other than losing the dive shops mask) then you will get another beer fine….

2. Incorrect basic terminology.

For your PADI Open Water Course you did five hours of videos, almost 100 knowledge review questions and exactly 90 quiz/exam questions and no time did PADI (or any other agency) refer to the mask as goggles, your fins as flippers, the tank as a bottle or the regulator as a respirator.

After more than seven hours of theory, there was probably no reason for your instructor to give you a beer fine warning. But they did. Cough up, make mine a Singha.

PADI Sidemount Pool Aussie Divers Phuket

PADI Sidemount Pool Aussie Divers Phuket

3. Leaving your tank standing up.

Some things in life are best learnt the hard way. As a kid you never really new how hot the fire was until you placed your hand in it. Well, you will never know how much it hurts to have a tank fall on your bare foot until it does.

Personally I think a beer fine is too lenient here. But a gentle nudge of the tank on your bare foot is a bit to old school for 2020.

A beer for leaving the tank standing up. A six pack if it falls over.

4. Thumbs up instead of an OK signal.

Another beer fine classic. Amazingly the thumbs up for OK went out of fashion in the early 70’s. The thumb – forefinger circle is still accepted on land version. But still, it is one of the most common beer fines.

One beer for one thumb and two beers for the two thumb salute.

Thumbs up Scuba DiverPhuket

Thumbs up Scuba DiverPhuket

5. No weight belt or no air after a buddy check.

BWRAF. Your instructor went through this with you, several times. They told you funny acronyms, they told you rude acronyms and you had a good laugh about it. They repeated it several times and most likely told you not to forget.

But still you managed to enter the water without your weight belt or having your air turned on.

One beer for each and another if your instructor had to swim back to the boat to get the weight belt.

This is one of the few reversible fines. If you instructor manages to get into the without the weight belt or asks you to turn their air on, you are entitled to beer fine credits.

Aussie Divers Luxury Speedboat Scuba Diving Phuket Giant Stride

Aussie Divers Luxury Speedboat Scuba Diving Phuket Giant Stride

6. Wearing speedos

Only Hulk Hogan can pull of wearing budgie smugglers.

One beer per dive penalty. Two beers per dive if the speedos are white, skin tone or leopard skin pattern.

7. Giant stride without hold mask or weight belt.

The starfish or bunny hop entries into the drink will earn you a beer fine.

Even if you do the incredibly funny classic belly wacker or face plunge into the water, once your instructor stops laughing they are still compelled to fine you.

Fines are doubled if you lose said weight belt or mask.

8. Kicking your instructor with your fins.

Stay behind me and above me your instructor briefed you. From that position it should be impossible to make fin contact with your instructor. Congratulations, you managed it.

One beer for body contact and two beers for head high contact.

9. Delaying a dive by slow preparation.

There is nothing an instructor love more than waiting on the surface for slow divers.

One beer fine for being slow, two beers per group member if a major creature is missed .i.e whale shark or manta ray. Another beer fine if you ask why you didn’t get a full time dived.

10. Taking the last beer on the boat.

If you manage to get the last beer on the boat, this is a beer fine.

Unlike other beer fines, this beer fine is imposed straight away and the said beer should be handed to the instructor immediately without hesitation and prior to being open.

This fine is void if the beer is warm, low alcohol or is made in New Zealand.

By Darren Gaspari

Proud owner and active PADI Gold Course Director of Aussie Divers Phuket, a professional and awarded PADI 5 Star Instructor Development Scuba Diving Centre. Member of the PADI Advisory Board for the eLearning modules 2019 and 2020.

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